Search Jokes
e.g. faraz, sardar, etc.

Train

2 blondes walk into the forest and stop at some tracks one of the blondes say those are bear tracks the other blonde says no those r dear tracks 1/2 hour later they were both killed by a train

by (few years ago!) / 4744 views
(Rated 3 Stars - 2 votes)
 

Similar Jokes

Blonde jokes

Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?A: Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.

by (few years ago!)
AN OCCUPATIONAL HAZZARD


A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money.

The gang was very happy to escape. "It ain't so bad," one crook noted. "We got $25 between us."

The boss screamed: "I warned you to stay clear of lawyers... we had $100 when we broke in!"

by (few years ago!)
Animal jokes

Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of hungry wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket.

After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, "Well, do you want to make a run for it, or should we stay here for a few days and out number them?"

by (few years ago!)
CLINTON'S BIGGEST BILL


President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.

"What is it?" exclaims the President.

"It's the Abortion Bill, Mr. President - what do you want to do about it?"

"Just go ahead and pay it."

by (few years ago!)
Lawyer jokes

lawyer finds out he has a brain tumor, and it is inoperable. In fact, it is so large that they have to do a brain transplant. His doctor gives him a choice of available brains: A jar of rocket scientist brains for $10 an ounce, A jar of regular scientist brains for $15 an ounce, or a jar of lawyer brains for the princely sum of $800 an ounce.

The outraged lawyer said, "This is a rip off! How come the lawyer brains are so expensive?"

The doctor replied, "Do you know how many lawyers it takes to get an ounce of brains?"

by (few years ago!)
Smartest Man in the World

A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble.

In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot grabbed a parachute, yelled to the passengers that they had better jump, and bailed out.

Unfortunately, there were only three parachutes remaining.

The doctor grabbed one and said "I'm a doctor, I save lives, so I must live," and jumped out.

The lawyer then said, "I'm a lawyer and lawyers are the smartest people in the world. I deserve to live."

He also grabbed a parachute and jumped.

The priest looked at the little boy and said, "My son, I've lived a long and full life. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Take the last parachute and live in peace."

The little boy handed the parachute back to the priest and said, "Not to worry, Father. The 'smartest man in the world' just took off with my back pack."

by (few years ago!)
top ten least popular self help books

10. "Lie Your Sweet Ass Off And Become A Millionaire"

9. "Choking Coaches For The Soul" by Latrell Sprewell

8. "Combing! The Revolutionary New Way To Adjust Your Hair"

7. "How To Win Friends And Influence People In The Bus Station Men's Room"

6. "If You Want To Lose Weight, Just Stop Eating, You Fat Cow"

5. "George Michael's Do-It-Yourself Handbook"

4. "Five Simple Steps To Reducing All Human Problems To An Over-Generalized Formula"

3. "8 Weeks To A Sweatier You"

2. "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, At Least One Teletubby Is From The West Village"

1. "It's Hopeless" by Jack Kevorkian

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?A: Her ankles.

by (few years ago!)
Bar jokes

Two men are sitting drinking at a bar at the top of the Empire State Building when the first man turns to the other and says: "You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the winds around the building are so intense that they carry you around the building and back into the window." The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar.

The second guy says, "What are you a nut? There is no way in hell that could happen." "No, it's true," said the first man, let me prove it to you." He gets up from the bar, jumps over the balcony, and plummets to the street below. When he passes the 10th floor, the high wind whips him around the building and back into the 10th floor window and he takes the elevator back up to the bar.

He met the second man, who looked quite astonished. "You know, I saw that with my own eyes, but that must have been a one time fluke." "No, I'll prove it again," says the first man as he jumps. Again just as he is hurling toward the street, the 10th floor wind gently carries him around the building and into the window.

Once upstairs he urges his fellow drinker to try it. "Well, what the hell," the second guy says, "it works, I'll try it!" He jumps over the balcony plunges downward, passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors... and hits the sidewalk with a "splat." Back upstairs the bartender turns to the other drinker, saying "You know, Superman, you're a real asshole when you're drunk."

by (few years ago!)
Business jokes

Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a wantad for an accountant. Now he was being interviewed by a verynervous man who ran a small business that he had started hiself."I need someone with an accounting degree the man said. "Butmainly, Im looking for someone to do my worrying for me.""Excuse me?" the accountant said."I worry about a lot of things," the man said. "But I dont want to have to worry about money. Your job will be to take all the money worries off my back.""I see," the accountant said. "And how much does the job pay?""Ill start you at eighty thousand.""Eighty thousand dollars!" the accountant exclaimed. "How can such asmall business afford a sum like that That," the owner said, "is your first worry

by (few years ago!)
  • Page 1 of 1
  • 1

Most Viewed Jokes

Marriage jokes

QUOTES FROM EMPLOYEE APPRAIS..

EAGER TO IMPRESS THE BOSS

Pain Killers

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

ERROR - UNABLE TO LOAD CONTROL : /controls/members/members_facebook.ascxd:\websites\azdomains\lol101.com\wwwroot\controls\members\members_facebook.ascx(11): error CS0103: The name 'FacebookSettings' does not exist in the current context