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Blonde jokes

A blonde was taking the tour of a national park not long ago The ranger mentioned to the tour group that dinosur fossils had been found in the area The blonde exclaimed Wow! I cant believe the dinosaurs would come this close to the highway.

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Blonde jokes

What do blondes eat to increase their breast size?A: Silicone chips.

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Men jokes

What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?A. Any place without a drive-up window.

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Computer jokes

Why was there a bug in the computer?It was looking for a byte to eat.

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SEX ON THE SABBATH


A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or play. He asks a priest for his opinion on this question. The priest says after consulting the Bible, "My son, after an exhaustive search I am positive sex is work and is not permitted the Sabbath."

The man thinks: "What does a priest know about sex?"

He goes to minister... a married man, experienced… for the answer. He queries the minister and receives the same reply. Sex is work and not for the Sabbath! Not pleased with the reply, he seeks out the ultimate authority -- a man of thousands of year's tradition and knowledge: a rabbi.

The rabbi ponders the question and states, "My son, sex is definitely play."

The man replies, "rabbi, how can you be so sure when so many others tell me sex is work?"

The rabbi softly speaks, " If sex were work...my wife would have the maid do it."

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Lawyer jokes

"You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man ofyour background," sneered the lawyer at a witness on the stand. "If I wasnt under oath, Id return the compliment," replied the witness.

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Blonde jokes

What thoughts do Blondes have after reading these jokes?A: None, as usual... and they most likely didnt understand them either

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The blonde test taker

A blonde reports for her university final exam which consists of mainly true and false questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet: true for heads and false for tails. Within thirty minutes she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still working furiously.

During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is happening.

"I finished the exam in a half hour," she replies. "Now I'm rechecking my answers."

by (few years ago!)
Blonde and Pizza

A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.

She responded, "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."

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Marriage jokes

A woman was in court charged with wounding her husband. "But why did you stab him over a hundred times?" asked the judge. "Oh, your Honor," replied the defendant, "I didnt know how to switch off the electric carving knife."

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Blonde jokes

What is the fastest way to get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?A. Wave at her.

by (few years ago!)
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