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Zoo jokes

I took my son to the zoo yesterday. Really, did they accept him?

by (few years ago!) / 521 views
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Jokes And Funny Stories About Animals - 5

by (few years ago!)
Marriage jokes

Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he sad to his wife: "When Im dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."Wife: "No, I cant marry anyone after you."Johnson: "But I want you to."Wife: "But why?"Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"

by (few years ago!)
Women jokes

My wife asked me "Whats on the TV?" - I said, "Dust!"

by (few years ago!)
Blonde Swimmer

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are in a breast stroke race. The starter's gun goes off and the three girls dive into the pool. The brunette and the redhead shoot across the pool and get out; 20 minutes later the blonde reaches the end and gets out. The judge says, "The gold medal goes to the brunette, the silver medal goes to the redhead, and the bronze goes to the blonde". The blonde says, "I don't want to be a sore loser, but I think the other girls were using their arms

by (few years ago!)
The lost ball

Two lawyers, Jon and Bill, head out for their usual 9 holes of golf. Jon offers Bill a $50 bet. Bill agrees and they`re off. They shoot a great game. After the 8th hole, Bill is ahead by one stroke, but cuts His ball into the rough on the 9th.

Help me find my ball. Look over there, he says to Jon. After a few minutes, neither has any luck. Since a lost ball carries a four stroke penalty, Bill secretly pulls a ball from His pocket and tosses it to the ground. I`ve found my ball! he announces. After all of the years we`ve been partners and playing together, Jon says, you`d cheat me out of a lousy 50 bucks?

What do you mean, cheat? I found my ball sitting right there!

And you`re a liar, too! Jon says. I`ll have you know I`ve been STANDING on your ball for the last five minutes!

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

Did you hear about the blonde that got pregnant for the second time?A: She asked her husband if they needed to get married again.

by (few years ago!)
Breast Enlargement

A woman says to her husband that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts.

Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery."

She asks, "How do I do it without surgery?"

Her husband answers, "Just rub toilet paper between them."

"How does that make them bigger?", she asks.

"I don't know, but it certainly worked for your ass."

by (few years ago!)
Jokes & Funny Stories About Blondes

Why didn't the Blonde have any ice cubes for her party?
A: She lost the recipe.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?A: The joystick is wet.

by (few years ago!)
No Jokes in Group of Death

Every football tournament usually consists of groups within which team tussle out,but there's one particular group that people have always developed cold feet for,and is usually composed of teams with similar abilities to tear each other apart.

World cup 2006 had a very interesting group of death,four teams it had ,one of which hails from a volatile region called Serbia,allied to another country with a name that I'd take three days to pronounce.

The players from this region have perfected their skills while dodging bullets during war,so they evolved a form of soccer called,dodge-soccer,where the main aim is to dodge the ball and get the man coming with it.

Of course the end result has usually been matches whereby the referee has a field day dishing out cards especially the red type of cards

by (few years ago!)
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