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Blonde jokes

What is the blondes chronic speech impediment?A: She cant say "No".

by (few years ago!) / 549 views
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What do you call two nuns and a blonde together?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver.

What did the Los Angeles Police Department and the Green Bay Packers have in common?
Neither could catch a Bronco.

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Bar jokes beer booze and fun

A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot.Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a ripoff! I put him on the pot before a whole audience, and he didnt dance a single step So asked the ducks former owner did you remember to light the candle under the pot

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Women jokes

Shortly after the birth of their second child, her husband offered to take her shopping for a new dress. He endured more than two hours of listening to her complaints about which figure flaw each dress accentuated. As she emerged from the dressing room, having tried on the last selection, she asked for her husbands opinion. By this time, he had learned just the right things to say. "Its perfect!" he exclaimed. "It makes your waist look smaller, your legs look longer and slenderizes your hips." Just then, a voice from the dressing room piped up. "If theres a dress here that will do all that- Ill take ten!"

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Men jokes

Men are like mini skirts. If youre not careful, theyll creep up your legs.

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blonde jokes

Three blonde men were walking through the desert when they found a magic genie's lamp. The genie said, "I will grant three wishes, one for each of you."

The first blonde guy said, "I wish I were smarter." So he became a redhead.

The second blonde man said, "I wish I were smarter than he is." The genie granted his wish and he became a brunette.

The third blonde man said, "I wish I were smarter than both of them." The genie said, "Okay." So he became a blonde woman.

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Blonde jokes

Did you hear about the blonde that invented the solar flashlight?

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An architect, an artist, and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.

The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.

The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both."

"Both?" asked the architect and artist in unison.

The engineer replied, "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume that you are spending time with the other woman, so you can go to the office and get some work done."

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How do I get across that river?

A dumb blonde is walking along, lost, and encounters a deep and wide river. She looks up and down the river for a way across but is unsuccessful in finding one. Yet, when looking to the other side again, she happened to see another blonde on the opposite river bank. She tried calling to her.

"How can I get to the other side of the river?" she shouts loudly.

The other blonde replied "What for? You are already on the other side of the river!"

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Religious jokes

Delivering a speech at a banquet on the night of his arrival in a large city, a visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day.Because he wanted to use the jokes again, he requested the reporters to omit them from any accounts they might turn in to their newspapers.A cub reporter, in commenting on the speech, ended his piece with the following: "The minister told a number of stories that cannot be published."

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Blonde jokes

A blonde and a brunette are sky-diving. The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord - nothing happens.She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.The blonde jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?

by (few years ago!)
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