Search Jokes
e.g. faraz, sardar, etc.

Japanese business

Four corporate presidents, one English, one French, one Japanese and one American, were on their way to an international business conference when they were kidnapped by terrorists and taken to a secret hideout.

"You, your companies, and you countries are enemies of the Revolution," screamed the terrorist leader, "and you're going to be executed! Do you have any last requests?"

The Englishman spoke first.

"Before I die, I want to honor my country and protest this barbaric act by singing "God Save The Queen" to all you men."

"That can be arranged," said the terrorist.

The Frenchman said, "And I want to honor my country before I die by singing "The Marseilles" to your men."

The Japanese said, "Before I die, I wish to honor my country by giving the lecture I was going to present on the Mapanese style of industrial management."

The terrorist turned finally to the American.

"What is your last request?"

The American replied, "I want you to kill me right now so I don't have to listen to another lecture on the Japanese style of industrial management!"

by (few years ago!) / 516 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

Similar Jokes

Sport jokes

Did you hear about the football team who ate too much pudding?They got jellygated!

by (few years ago!)
UNDER THE STREET LIGHT

Late at night, a drunk was on his knees beneath a street-light, evidently looking for something. A passer-by, being a good Samaritan, offered to help. "What is it you have lost?" he asked.

"My watch," replied the drunk. "It fell off when I tripped over the pavement."

The passer-by joined in the search but after a quarter of an hour, there was still no sign of the watch. "Where exactly did you trip?" asked the passer-by.

"About half a block up the street," replied the drunk.

"Then why are you looking for your watch here if you lost it half a block up the street?"

The drunk said: "Because the light's a lot better here."\

by (few years ago!)
Buying a New Farm

A blonde and a brunette decide to start a farm together. They add up their life savings into a total of $200.00.

Then, the blonde decided to purchase a bull with it. The brunette agrees, and so the brunette leaves to go find the perfect bull. When she does she is to telegram the blonde and tell her to come get it.

Finally, the brunette find the bull of her dreams. The farmer says he wants $200 for it. The brunette, thinking she can get a better deal, says no to his offer.

The farmer says, "Alright then, I'll give you a great deal, how about $199.00?"

The brunette accepts and buys the bull. She has $1.00 left for the telegram. The telegram guy says, "It's $1.00 per word." The brunette thinks about this and says,"Comfortable, write that."

"Comfortable?" the guy questions.

"Yes, you see she reads slow."

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

. Why did the blonde write "TGIF" on her shoes?A. To remind her that "toes go in first."

by (few years ago!)
THE WORKS OUTING

This guy was staggering along the road, much the worse for the drink, throwing empty beer cans into the street and falling into peoples gardens. His singing gained the attention of a passing policeman who decided to question him.

"What do you think you're doing there?" the policeman asked.

"I'm on my works outing" came the slurred reply.

"Then" the policeman queried, "where are all the others?"

"Ah" the man grinned, "You see officer, I'm self employed!"

by (few years ago!)
THE RABBIT AND THE SNAKE

A blind rabbit and a blind snake meet each other. Neither one remembers what kind of animal they are, so they decide to feel each other.

The rabbit says, "You feel me first." The snake says okay, and he starts feeling the rabbit.

He says, "Well, you have fur all over, and a little cotton tail, and two long ears, and big back feet..."

The rabbit says, "I know! I'm a rabbit! Yippee!" Then the rabbit feels the snake.
He says, "Okay, you're long and thin, and slimy all over, and there's a little forked tongue..."

The snake says, "Oh no, I'm a lawyer."

by (few years ago!)
Women jokes

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? - The dog. Hell shut up once you let him in.

by (few years ago!)
Religious jokes

One Sunday morning the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The young man of seven had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up and stood beside him and gazing up at the plaque he said quietly, "Good morning son." "Good morning pastor" replied the young man not taking his eyes off the plaque. "Sir, what is this?" Johnny asked."Well son, these are all the people who have died in the service", replied the pastor. Soberly, they stood together staring up at the large plaque.Little Johnnys voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly, "Which one sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30?"

by (few years ago!)
Get caught sleeping at work?



"They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

"This is just a 15 minute power-nap as described in that time management course you sent me."

"Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out You probably got here just in time!"

"I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."

"I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

"I was doing Yoga exercises to relieve work-related stress."

"Damn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

"The coffee machine is broken..."

"Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."

" ... in Jesus' name. Amen."

by (few years ago!)
Blonde Lumberjack

A blonde travels to Canada to seek her
fortune as a lumberjack. She meets a
foreman of a logging organization who
offers to give her a job.

"Now, I hope you realize we expect you
to cut down at least 100 trees a day,"
the foreman told her.

The blonde woman didn't see this as a
problem, so she went out with the
Chainsaw and did her best. She came
back drenched in sweat.

"Geez lady, how many trees did you cut
down?" asked the foreman.
"6" she replied.
"What!? You have to do better than that.
Get up earlier tomorrow!"

So she did. Out she went with the
chainsaw, she came back that night
exhausted.

"How many this time?" asked the foreman.
"12" she said.
The foreman says, "That does it. I'm
coming out there with you tomorrow
morning!"

The next morning, the foreman reaches
the first tree and says, "This is how
to cut down trees really quickly."
He pulls the rope on the chainsaw and
it gives off a loud BRRRRRRUUUMMM.

He notices the blonde is looking at him
frantically, so he asks her what's wrong.

And she replies, "What the hell is that
noise?"

by (few years ago!)
  • Page 1 of 1
  • 1

Most Viewed Jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Train

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

QUOTES FROM EMPLOYEE APPRAIS..

EAGER TO IMPRESS THE BOSS

ERROR - UNABLE TO LOAD CONTROL : /controls/members/members_facebook.ascxd:\websites\azdomains\lol101.com\wwwroot\controls\members\members_facebook.ascx(11): error CS0103: The name 'FacebookSettings' does not exist in the current context