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Dog jokes

How do you keep a dog from barking in your front yard?Put him in your back yard.

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Miss Bea was in her eighties, and much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in the spring, and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlour. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared a little tea.

As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glas bowl sitting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom. Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine his curiosity! Surely Miss Bea had flipped or something! But he certainly couldn't mention the strange sight in her parlour.

When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he could resist no longer. "Miss Bea", he said, gesturing toward the bowl, " I wonder if you would tell me about this"

"Oh, yes", she replied, " Isn't it wonderful? I was walking downtown last fall and I found this little package. It said to put it on the organ and keep it wet, and it would prevent disease. And you know, I think it's working! I haven't had a cold all winter!"

by (few years ago!)
Saving Her Butt`

A man decided to paint the toilet while his wife was away. His wife came home sooner than he expected, used the toilet, and got the seat stuck to her rear. She was understandably distraught about this and asked her husband to drive her to the doctor. She put a large overcoat on to cover the seat before they went.

When they got to the doctor's office, the man lifted his wife's coat to show him their predicament. The man asked, "Doctor, have you ever seen anything like this before?"

"Well, yes," the doctor replied, "but never framed."

by (few years ago!)
Dog jokes

When is a black dog not a black dog ?When its a greyhound !

by (few years ago!)
Sport jokes

What part of a football ground is never the same ?The changing rooms !

by (few years ago!)
Business jokes

The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously."Whats the matter?" grumbled the boss. "Havent you got a sense of humor?""I dont have to laugh," she replied. "Im leaving Friday."

by (few years ago!)
About JokesByKids

clean kids jokes, and growing every day! JokesByKids.com is published by me, Barbara J. Feldman: mom, wife, syndicated columnist, and founder of

by (few years ago!)
Men jokes

Men are like horoscopes.They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

by (few years ago!)
Men jokes

How many men does it take to mop the floor?Answer: None, its a womens job.

by (few years ago!)
Sports Jokes

A woman is picked up by Dennis Rodman in a bar. They like each other and she goes back with him to his hotel room. He removes his shirt revealing all his tattoos and she sees that on his arm is one which reads, "Reebok." She thinks that is a bit odd and asks him about it.

Dennis says, "When I play basketball, the cameras pick up the tattoo and Reebok pays me for advertisement." A bit later, his pants are off and she sees "Puma" tattooed on his leg.

He gives the same explanation for the unusual tattoo. Finally, the underwear comes off and she sees the word "AIDS" tattooed on his penis. She jumps back with shock.

"I'm not going to do it with a guy who has AIDS!" exclaims the woman.

Dennis Rodman replies, "It's cool baby. In a minute it's going to say 'ADIDAS.'"

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs?A: Some traffic signs say stop.

by (few years ago!)
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