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e.g. faraz, sardar, etc.

Computer Acronyms

PCMCIA
People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms

ISDN
It Still Does Nothing

APPLE
Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity

SCSI
System Can't See It

DOS
Defective Operating System

BASICBill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control

IBM
I Blame Microsoft

DEC
Do Expect Cuts

CD-ROM
Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months

OS/2
Obsolete Soon, Too.

WWW
World Wide Wait

MACINTOSH
Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs

PENTIUM
Produces Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics

COBOL
Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language

AMIGA
A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction

LISP
Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis

MIPS
Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed

WINDOWS
Will Install Needless Data On Whole System

GIRO
Garbage In Rubbish Out

MICROSOFT
Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only (for) Fools (&) Teenagers.

by (few years ago!) / 757 views
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Similar Jokes

Business jokes

A Texas Oil Tycoon and an Alaskan Oil Tycoon were debating on which state had the most oil. The Alaskan Oil Tycoon said, "Listen, there is so much oil in Alaska that I could buy enough gold to build a wall of solid gold 100 feet tall and 100 feet wide all the way around the state of Texas". The Texas Oil Tycoon scratched his chin and adjusted his cowboy hat and said, "Well boy, I'll tell ya what....you just go ahead and build that wall, and if I like it.......I'll buy it".

by (few years ago!)
POPULATING THE EARTH


After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her."

Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a kiss?" So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush.

A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that was enjoyable."

And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I'd like you to caress Eve."

And Adam said, " 'What is a 'caress'? So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description and Adam went behind the bush with Eve.

Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "'Lord, that was even better than the kiss."

And the Lord said, "'You've done well Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve."

And Adam asked, "What is 'make love' Lord?"' So the Lord again gave Adam directions and Adam went again to Eve behind the bush, but this time he reappeared in two seconds.

And Adam said, "Lord, what is a 'headache'?"

by (few years ago!)
School jokes

Teacher : What are you reading ?Pupil : I dunno !Teacher : But youre reading aloud !Pupil : But Im not listening !

by (few years ago!)
Mafia Job

The Mafia was looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all the private businesses that they were "protecting."

Feeling the heat from the police force, they decide to use a deaf person for this job.

If he were to get caught, he wouldn't be able to communicate to the police what he was doing.

Well, on his first week, the deaf collector picks up over $40,000.

He gets greedy, decides to keep the money and stashes it in a safe place.

The Mafia soon realizes that their collection is late, and sends someo of their hoods after the deaf collector.

The hoods find the deaf collector and ask him where the money is.

The deaf collector can't communicate with them, so the Mafia drags the guy to an interpreter.

The Mafia hood says to the interpreter, "Ask him where da money is."

The interpreter signs, "Where's the money?"

The deaf man replies, "I don't know what you're talking about."

The interpreter tells the hood, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."

The hood pulls out a .38 and places it in the ear of the deaf collector. "Now ask him where the money is!"

The interpreter signs, "Where is the money?"

The deaf man replies, "The $40,000 is in a tree stump in Central Park."

The interpreter says to the hood, "He says he still doesn't know what you're talking about, and doesn't think you have the balls to pull the trigger."

by (few years ago!)
Irish Gas Attendant

Taking a wee break from the golf circuit, Tiger Woods drives his new Buick Rendezvous into an Irish gas station. An attendant greets him in typical Irish manner, unaware who the golf pro is, “Top o’ the morning to ya”. As Tiger gets out of the car, two tees fall out of his pocket. “So what are those thing my, son?” asks the attendant.

“They’re called tees,” replied Tiger.

“And what would ya be usin ‘em for, now?” inquired the Irishman.

“Well, they’re for resting my balls on when I drive,” replies Tiger.

“Aw, Jaysus, Mary an’ Joseph!” exclaimed the Irish attendant. “Those fellas working for Buick think of everything!”

by (few years ago!)
The President''s Puzzle

Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering.
"What's the matter, Mr. President?" The Vice President inquired.

"Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" The President beamed.

"How long did it take you?"

"Well, the box said '3 to 5 Years' but I did it in a month!"

by (few years ago!)
Business jokes

When Abraham Liebowitz gets to school he discovers that he is the only Jewish kid in the class. But its a decent town and nobody really bothers him. One day the teacher asks the class "Who was the greatest person who ever lived? and why?" And to make it interesting she held a twenty dollar bill in the air and said "whoever gives the best answer will get this twenty dollars". All of the kids called out their guesses. One said "George Washington - because he was the father of our country." "Thats excellent" said the teacher. Another said "Abraham Lincoln - because he freed the slaves." "Thats also good" said the teacher, reluctant to bestow an excellent, but still being polite. One little girl said "Joan of Arc - because she saved France." Another excellent choice said the teacher. Then Abraham Liebowitz, raised his hand. nSo the teacher called on him. "Abraham, who do you think was the greatest person who ever lived, and why?" And Abraham said "Jesus Christ." The teacher was shocked. "Abraham," she said "Im very surprised. Class, I think we can all agree that Abraham should get the twenty dollars." And she handed Abraham Liebowitz the money. At recess, the teacher was still very impressed. So she asked Abraham why he said Jesus. Abraham said "Look, personally I think Moses was the greatest person who ever lived, but... business is business!"

by (few years ago!)
Business jokes

A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. I welcome you into the family,” said the man. “To show you how much we care for you, I am making you a 50-50 partner in my business. All you have to do is go to the factory everyday and learn the operation.”
The son-in-law interrupted. “I hate factories. I can’t stand the noise.” “I see.” replied the father-in-law, “Well, then you’ll work in the office and take charge of some of the operations.” “I hate office work,” said the son-in-law. “I can’t stand being stuck behind a desk.” “Wait a minute,” said the father-in-law. “I just made you half owner of a money-making industry, but you don’t like factories, and won’t work in an office. What am I going to do with you?” “Easy,” said the son-in-law. “Buy me out.

by (few years ago!)
Religious jokes

Jesus saw a crowd chasing down a woman to stone her and approached them. "Whats going on here, anyway?" he asked."This woman was found committing adultery, and the law says we should stone her!" one of the crowd responded."Wait," yelled Jesus. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."Suddenly, a stone was thrown from out of the sky, and knocked the woman on the side of her head."Aw, cmon, Dad..." Jesus cried, "Im trying to make a point here!"

by (few years ago!)
School jokes

Laugh and the class laughs with you.But you get detention alone !

by (few years ago!)
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