Search Jokes
e.g. faraz, sardar, etc.

School jokes

A student comes to a young professors office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly."I would do anything to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean..." she whispers, "...I would do...anything." He returns her gaze. "Anything?" "Anything." His voice softens. "Anything??" "Absolutely anything." His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you...study?"

by (few years ago!) / 687 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

Similar Jokes

A CASE OF MISTAKEN IDENTITY


A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near-death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it. God says no and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live.

Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, and a tummy tuck. She even has someone come in and change her hair colour. She figures that since she's got another 30 or 40 years she might as well make the most of it.

She walks out the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital.

She arrives in front of God again and asks, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years?"

God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you."

by (few years ago!)
blonde jokes

Complaint letter from Aimee:

Us blonds at the offise are sew tired of awl of the dum stoopid jokes about us. We think this is hairassment. It causes us grate stress and makes our roots turn dark. We have hired a loyer and he is talking to the loyers at Clairol. We will take this all the way to the supreme cort if we have two. Juj Thomas knos all about hairassment and he will be on are side.

We have also talked to the govner to make a new law to stop this pursicushun. We want a law that makes peepol tell brewnet jokes as much as blond jokes and every so offen a read head joke.

If we don't get our way, we will not date anybody that ain't blond and we will make up jokes about you and we will laff.

Sined by the blonds at the offise

(Pleese sine with a pensil so you can erace it if you make a mistake.)

by (few years ago!)
School jokes

Father: What did the teacher think of your idea?Son: She took it like a lambTeacher: Really?, what did she say?Son: Baa!

by (few years ago!)
THE SMELL OF FRESH BLOOD

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.

He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.

"OK, follow me" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.

Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.

"Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked.

"Yes, Yes, Yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy.

"Good" said the bat, "Because I sure as hell didn't!"

by (few years ago!)
For all men who like to send blonde jokes, it's time for paybacks

How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes? Both of them.
Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg? They don't stop and ask for directions.
What do men and sperm have in common? They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.
How does a man show that he is planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer.
What is the difference between men and government bonds? The bonds mature.
Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them.
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know; it has never happened.
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking? They all have boyfriends already.
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow.
When do you care for a man's company? When he owns it.
Why are married women heavier than single women? Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
His hand caught fire.
How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.
What did God say after creating man? I must be able to do better than that.
What did God say after creating Eve? Practice makes perfect.
How are men and parking spots alike? Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely short.
What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? They're married.
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?
"God says: "So you would love her."
"But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?
"God says: "So she would love you

by (few years ago!)
Lawyer jokes

It seems that a devout, good couple was about to get married,but a tragic car accident ended their lives. When they got toheaven, they asked St. Peter if he could arrange for them toget married, saying that it was what they had hoped for in life,and they still desired wedded union. He thought about it andagreed, but said they would have to wait.It was almost one hundred years later when St. Peter sent forthem. They were married in a simple ceremony. So things wenton, for thirty years or so, but they determined, in this time,that eternity was best not spent together. They went back toSt. Peter, and said: "We thought we would be happy forever, butnow we believe that we have irreconcilable differences. Is thereany way we can get divorced?" "Are you kidding?" said St. Peter."It took me a hundred years to get a priest up here to marryyou. I will never get a lawyer!"

by (few years ago!)
Jokes & Funny Stories About Blondes - 6

What happened to the Blonde terrorist who tried to blow up a bus?
She burned her lips on the exhaust pipe.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

Why did the mirror have 6 holes in it? A: A blonde tried to shoot herself!

by (few years ago!)
FREE DRINKS FOR THE BLIND

A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!"

The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my guide dog."

"Oh man,” the bartender says, "I'm sorry, here, the first one's on me." The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door.

Another guy walks in the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says "You can't bring that dog in here unless you tell him it's a guide dog." The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar where he asks for a drink.

The bartender says "Hey, you can't bring that dog in here!"

The second man replies "This is my guide dog."

The bartender says, "No, I don't think so. They do not have Chihuahuas as guide dogs."

The man pauses for a half-second and replies "What? They gave me a Chihuahua?"

by (few years ago!)
Women jokes

Why havent Women landed on the Moon? - Because it doesnt need cleaning yet!

by (few years ago!)
  • Page 1 of 1
  • 1

Most Viewed Jokes

QUOTES FROM EMPLOYEE APPRAIS..

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Pain Killers

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes

EAGER TO IMPRESS THE BOSS

Train

Blonde jokes

ERROR - UNABLE TO LOAD CONTROL : /controls/members/members_facebook.ascxd:\websites\azdomains\lol101.com\wwwroot\controls\members\members_facebook.ascx(11): error CS0103: The name 'FacebookSettings' does not exist in the current context