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e.g. faraz, sardar, etc.

Computer jokes

Dear God: Yesterday was an awful day for me...My husband ran off with his secretary,My son pierced his eyebrow,My daughter tattooed the bald spot on her head,My dog mated with the neighbors cat,My neighbor sold her house to a mental institution,My Mom told me I was adopted,My Dad told me hes gay,My boss told me I was laid off,My sister was arrested for prostitution,My house has termites,My car was stolen,All that came in the mail was bills,A plane, crash landed on my garage,OJ Simpson came to my door selling rug cleaner,And my TV blew.Lord, please be with me today. I was able to live through all that misery yesterday. And I will be able to make it through anything today! But please....DONT LET ANYTHING HAPPEN TO MY COMPUTER!!!!!AMENA programmer enters an elevator, wanting to go to the 12th floor.So, he pushes 1, then he pushes 2, and starts looking for the Enter....

by (few years ago!) / 455 views
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Marriage jokes

When Joes wife ran away with his car, his money and his best friend, he got so depressed that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist.Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said, "Life isnt worth living. I think Im gonna top myself.""Dont be stupid, Joe," said the psychiatrist. "My wife ran off and left me too, yet Im happy.""How?" asked Joe."Easy," replied the quack. "I threw myself into my work. I totally submerged myself in my job and soon forgot her. By the way, Joe, what work do you do?""I clean out septic tanks." Joe replied.

by (few years ago!)
Al's Wedding-related jokes and one-liners.

This marriage jokes list started as just a collection of amusing (to me, at least) odds and ends which would catch my eye from time to time. This collection was born when I decided to focus on marriage/relationship/battle-of-the-sexes items. (You should see the items I left out!) With some creativity, many of the items on these pages could be worked into a wedding reception speech. Using some of them in speeches will require more creativity (or courage) than others. Sensitive souls may find some of the material rather raw.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

Why do blondes occupy about 90% of the net bandwidth? A: Because they keep accidentally deleting their copies of the blonde joke list.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

What do you call 100 blondes standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel!

by (few years ago!)
Computer jokes

Technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

Why did it take the blonde a whole week to wash three basement windows?A: It took her six days just to dig the holes to put the ladder in.

by (few years ago!)
A Hairy Situation

A man walks into a barber shop with his daughter. The girl is eating her favorite snack: a Twinkie. She stands very close to her father as he gets his hair cut in the chair.
After a few minutes of snipping away, the barber looks down at the girl and says, ''Sweetie, you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie!''

The girl says, ''Yeah, I know. I'm gonna get boobies too!''

by (few years ago!)
THE WITTLE WABBITS


A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?"

And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute wittle bwown wabby over there?"

The little girl puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice: "I don't fink my pyfon really giveths a thit."

by (few years ago!)
Computer jokes

How many C++ programmers does it take to change a light bulb?"Youre still thinking procedurally! A properly designed light bulb object would inherit a change method from a generic light bulb class!"

by (few years ago!)
Dog jokes

What do you call a boring dog? A dull-mation!

by (few years ago!)
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