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Political jokes

How many Democrats does it take to destroy a light bulb?A: None. They only know how to destroy the taxpayers.

by (few years ago!) / 852 views
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Similar Jokes

Dog jokes

Why does a d dog scratch himself?He is the only one that knows where it itches.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

How did the blonde die ice-fishing?A. She was run over by the zambonis machine.

by (few years ago!)
Marriage jokes

Son: Is it true? Dad, I heard that in ancient China, a man doesnt know his wife until he marries.Father: That happens everywhere, son, everywhere!

by (few years ago!)
jokes about dumb blondes, blonde jokes

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"

The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"

Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.

The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then, the blonde flipped the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Darnit, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"

by (few years ago!)
Bill Gates' Honeymoon

After Bill Gates wedding night, his wife finally knew why he called his company Microsoft.

by (few years ago!)
Marriage jokes

A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice.The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boys nervousness builds.He remembers his fathers advice, and chooses the first topic.He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns.After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his fathers suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his fathers advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a br other, would he like spinach?"

by (few years ago!)
TWO STRINGS

These two strings walk up to a bar. The first string walks in and orders and the bartender throws him out and yells "I don't serve strings in this bar..."

The other string ruffs himself up on the street and curls up and orders... The bartender shouts, "Hey, didn't you hear what I told your buddy?"

String says "Yeah."

Bartender says, "aren't you a string?"

String says, "No, I'm a frayed knot..."

by (few years ago!)
Animal Jokes

There were three Indian squaws. One slept on a deerskin, one slept on an elk skin and the third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant and the first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin had twin boys. This goes to prove that the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.

by (few years ago!)
Men jokes

Why did God create a man before a women?You need a rough draft before you have a final copy.

by (few years ago!)
A Blonde and a Waitress

A blonde walks into a restaurant to get some lunch, and while she's deciding on what she wants a waitress comes up.

The blonde looks up and notices the waitress's name tag on her shirt.

"Gee, that's nice. What did you name the other one?"

by (few years ago!)
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