Search Jokes
e.g. faraz, sardar, etc.

Marriage jokes

At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends."The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. And stay home at night!" An old granny overheard and spoke up, "Honey, if thats all you want, get a TV!"

by (few years ago!) / 528 views
(Not Rated Yet)

Similar Jokes

Dog jokes

When is a black dog not a black dog ?When its a greyhound !

by (few years ago!)
Business jokes

Cajun named, Jean Paul, moved to Texas and bought a donkey from
an old farmer named Ben for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the
donkey the next day.

The next day, Ben drove up and said, "Sorry, but I have some bad news.
The donkey died."
"Well, then, just give me the money back," said Jean Paul
"Can't do that. I went and spent it already." Replied Ben
"OK, then. Just unload the donkey," said Jean Paul.
"What ya going to do with him?" asked Ben.
"I'm going to raffle him off," said Jean Paul.
"You can't raffle off a dead donkey!" uttered Ben.
"Sure can. Watch me. I just won't tell that he's dead," said Jean Paul.
A month later Ben met up with the Cajun and asked, "What happened
with that dead donkey?"
"I raffled him off, I did. I sold 500-hunderd tickets at two dollars apiece
and made a profit of $898," said Jean Paul.
"Didn't anyone complain?" inquired Ben.
"Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back,” said Jean Paul.

by (few years ago!)
Jokes & Funny Stories About Blondes - 2

Why shouldn't blondes be given a coffee break?
It takes too long to retrain them.

by (few years ago!)
Religious jokes

What do you call a sleepwalking nun? A: A roamin Catholic!

by (few years ago!)
office jokes

A well-known proverb states that an optimistic would say a glass is half full, while a pessimist would say it is half empty. What would people of different professions and walks of life say?

The BANKER would say that the glass has just under 50% of its net worth in liquid assets.

The GOVERNMENT would say that the glass is fuller than if the opposition party were in power.

The OPPOSITION would say that it is irrelevant because the present administration has changed the way such volume statistics are collected.

The ECONOMIST would say that, in real terms, the glass is 25% fuller than at the same time last year.

The PHILOSOPHER would say that, if the glass was in the forest and no one was there to see it, would it be half anything?

The PSYCHIATRIST would ask, "What did your mother say about the glass?"

The PHYSICIST would say that the volume of this cylinder is divided into two equal parts; one a colorless, odorless liquid, the other a colorless, odorless gas. Thus the cylinder is neither full nor empty. Rather, each half of the cylinder is full, one with a gas, one with a liquid.

The SEASONED DRINKER would say that the glass doesn't have enough ice in it.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island.One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp. They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie.The genie says, "Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one."The brunette says, "Ive been stuck here for years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home."POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family.Then, the red head says, "Ive been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too."POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family.The blonde starts crying uncontrollably.The genie asks, "My dear, whats the matter?"The blonde whimpers, "I wish my friends were still here."

by (few years ago!)
School jokes

Father: How do you like going to school?Son: The going bit is fine, as is the coming home bit too, but Im not too keen on the time in-between!

by (few years ago!)

A Jewish man lives into a Catholic neighbourhood. Every Friday The Catholics are driven crazy because, while they're morosely eating fish, the Jew is outside barbecuing steaks. So the Catholics work on the Jew to convert him to Catholicism.

Finally, after many threats and much pleading, the Catholics succeed. They take the Jew to a priest who sprinkles holy water on the Jew and says, "Born a Jew, Raised a Jew, Now a Catholic."

The Catholics are ecstatic. No more delicious, but maddening smells every Friday evening. But the next Friday evening, the scent of barbecue wafts through the neighbourhood.

The Catholics all rush to the Jew's house to remind him of his new diet. They see him standing over the cooking steak.

He is sprinkling water on the meat and saying, "Born a cow, Raised a cow, Now a fish."

by (few years ago!)
Clean the Mouse

How to clean your mouse...

This memo is from an unnamed computer company. It went to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem.

The author of this memo was quite serious. The engineers rolled on the floor.

Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit) therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement.

Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel.

Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse.

Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls.

Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse.

Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop off method.

Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist-off method.

Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive.

However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.

Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately.

It is recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction.

Any customer missing his balls should suspect local personnel of removing these necessary items.

by (few years ago!)
Jokes And Funny Stories About Education - 2

A student who changes the course of history is probably taking an exam.

by (few years ago!)
  • Page 1 of 1
  • 1

Most Viewed Jokes

Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes


Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes


Blonde jokes

Blonde jokes


Blonde jokes

ERROR - UNABLE TO LOAD CONTROL : /controls/members/members_facebook.ascxd:\websites\azdomains\\wwwroot\controls\members\members_facebook.ascx(11): error CS0103: The name 'FacebookSettings' does not exist in the current context