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Marriage jokes

wealthy man sat in his attorneys office."Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?"the lawyer asked."Give me the bad news first.""Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars.""Thats the bad news?" the man asked incredulously."I cant wait to hear the terrible news.""Its of you and your mistress."

by (few years ago!) / 558 views
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Animal Jokes

The National Game warden put out a warning to all hikers in his area. Warning that they should wear small bells on their boots so not to startle the bears. To distinguish the grizzly bear the notice read-- small bears droppings are small with nut and berries in it. Grizzly bear droppings are much larger with nuts and berries and little tiny bells in it.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

Teller: Why did the blonde move to L.A. Blonde I dont know. Why Teller It was easier to spell.Blonde Easier than what

by (few years ago!)
Dog jokes

What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog ?Dingo Starr !

by (few years ago!)
Signs You're Burned Out

10. You're so tired you now answer the phone, 'Hell.' 9. Your friends call to ask how you've been, and you immediately scream, 'Get off my back, bitch!' 8. Your garbage can IS your 'in' box. 7. You wake up to discover your bed is on fire, but go back to sleep because you just don't care. 6. You have so much on your mind, you've forgotten how to pee. 5. Visions of the upcoming weekend help you make it through Monday. 4. You sleep more at work than at home. 3. You leave for a party and instinctively bring your ID badge. 2. You blasted your Daily Planner with a .357 Magnum a week ago, but still haven't been able to miss a meeting. 1. You think about how relaxing it would be if you were in jail right now.

by (few years ago!)
Men jokes

Men are like placemats. They only show up when theres food on the table.

by (few years ago!)
office jokes

Hire Teenagers
while they still know everything!
HELP WANTED:
TELEPATHY

You know where to apply Why is the man who invests all of your money
called a broker?

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

A blonde was filling out an application form for a job. She promptly filled the columns entitled NAME, AGE, ADDRESS, etc. Then she came to the column: SALARY EXPECTED.Yes.

by (few years ago!)
Dog jokes

What is the best kind of dog to direct traffic at a busy intersection A pointer

by (few years ago!)
TRYING TO SELL HER CAR

A blonde made several attempts to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems finding a buyer because the car had 340,000 miles on it. She discussed her problem with a brunette that she worked with at a bar.

The brunette suggested, "There may be a chance to sell that car easier, but it's not going to be legal."

"That doesn't matter at all," replied the blonde. "All that matters it that I am able to sell this car."

"Alright," replied the brunette. In a quiet voice, she told the blonde: "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop around here. Tell him I sent you, and he will turn the counter back on your car to 40,000 miles. Then it shouldn't be a problem to sell your car."

The following weekend, the blonde took a trip to the mechanic on the brunette's advice.

About one month after that, the brunette saw the blonde and asked, "Did you sell your car?"

"No!" replied the blonde. "Why should I? It only has 40,000 miles on it

by (few years ago!)
Marriage jokes

What happened at the cannibals wedding party? They toasted the bride and groom.

by (few years ago!)
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