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Language Jokes June 1, 2008 at 8:37 am (Animal Jokes, Animals, Clean, Comedy, Famous Jokes, Free, Fun, Funny, Funny Jokes, Funny Stuff, Humor, Humour, Joke, Jokes, Short Jokes, Silly) Tags: Funny, Funny Jokes, Humour, Jokes, Language, Language Jokes Language Jokes What language do pigs speak? Swine language.

by (few years ago!) / 583 views
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Men jokes

Why did God create a man before a women?You need a rough draft before you have a final copy.

by (few years ago!)
BAR JOKES - WALKE IN A BAR

A man walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer. He looks around, admiring the room and he soon notices that there are big lumps of meat hanging on the ceiling. He then says to the bartender, "Why have you got all this meat hanging around?''.
The barman says, 'It's a little bet that we are running. If you can jump up and grab a bit of meat in your mouth then you can have all of your drinks bought for you. If you fail then you have to buy everyone else in the bar their drinks for them. Are you going to have a try at it''. The man shakes his head and says to the bartender, "No, the stakes are to high." (stakes/steaks)

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

What happens when a Blonde eats a mosquito? A.) She has more brain cells in her stomach than her head

by (few years ago!)
A Blonde Astronaut

There was a blonde, a red head, and a brunette and they were all up in space.

Each girl tried thinking up ways to be better then the other two...

The red head said, "I am going to be the first woman to land on mars."

The brunette said, "I can beat that, I'll be the first woman to land on saturn."

The blonde said, "I'll beat both of you, I'll be the first woman to land on the sun."

"How are you going to do that", the other two asked.

"Simple", said the blonde. "I'll go at night!"

by (few years ago!)
Animal jokes

A couple is dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They phone for a cab, turn on a night light, cover their pet parakeet and put the cat out in the back yard.

The taxi arrives, and they open the front door to leave. Suddenly the cat they put out scoots back into the house. They don't want the cat shut in there because she always tries to eat the bird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes back in. The cat runs upstairs, with the man in hot pursuit.

The wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will be empty. She explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."

A few minutes later the husband gets into the cab.

"Sorry I took so long," he says, as they drive away. "Stupid hag was hiding under the bed. Had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat butt downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!

The cab driver hit a parked car.

by (few years ago!)
Jokes And Funny Stories About Marriage - 6

When a man was reading the newspaper, his wife asked, "Will you still love me when I'm old and gray?" "Sure I do," he mumbled.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

How do you recognize a blonde at a car wash?A: Shes the one on her bike.

by (few years ago!)
Dog jokes

A Chihuahua was shopping in a mall when another shopper walked up to it and started talking Didnt I see you on a TV commercial How am I supposed to know what you was on TV.

by (few years ago!)
Marriage jokes

The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determinedto track down the father to extract revenge."Was it my friend Sam", he demanded."No !" his weeping wife replied."Was it my friend Jim then?" he asked."NO !!!" she said even more upset."Well which one of my no good friends did this then?" he asked."Dont you think I have any friends of my own?" she snapped.

by (few years ago!)
Blonde jokes

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night hes doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, hes going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "Ive heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a persons hair have to do with her worth as a human being? Its guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!"The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! Im talking to that little idiot on your knee!"

by (few years ago!)
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