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Some yogurt visits a local bar

Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, who was a tub of cottage cheese, says to them, "We don't serve your kind in here."

One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, "Why not? We're cultured individuals."

by (few years ago!) / 646 views
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Bar jokes beer booze and fun

consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

by (few years ago!)
FALSE ECONOMY

A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer.
"Certainly, sir, that'll be 1 cent."

"One penny?!" exclaimed the guy.

The barman replied, "Yes."

So, the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks, "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with fries, peas, and a salad?"

"Certainly sir," replies the bartender, "but all that comes to real money."

"How much money?" inquires the guy.

"Four cents," he replies.

"Four cents?!" exclaims the guy. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife." The guy says,

"What's he doing with your wife?"

The bartender replies, "Same as what I'm doing to his business."

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GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS


God says to Adam, "I have some good news and some bad news. What do you want to hear first?"

Adam says, "Tell me the good news first."

God says, "I'm going to give you a penis and a brain. You'll derive from these great pleasure and great intellect."

Adam replies, "Wonderful! But what's the bad news?"

God says, "I'm only going to give you enough blood supply to work one at a time."

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Did you hear the one about the blonde that had a problem with her bed?She couldnt find a knife large enough to apply the bed spread.

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Blonde jokes

A brunette doing laundry asked her blonde friend to help her find a match for her sock. The blonde replied, What for? Are you going to set it on fire!

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Did you hear about the businessman who is so rich he has two swimming pools, one of which is always empty? Its for people who cant swim!

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Sports jokes

When a football team is having trouble getting into the win column, fans usually assign a more appropriate name to describe that team's performance.

Denver Broncos = Denver Donkeys
Kansas City Chiefs = Kansas City Griefs
Los Angeles Raiders = Los Angeles Faders
San Diego Chargers = San Diego Rechargers
Seattle Seahawks = Seattle Weehawks

Cincinnati Bengals = Cincinnati Plaingels
Cleveland Browns = Cleveland Clowns
Houston Oilers = Houston Spoilers
Pittsburgh Steelers = Pittsburgh Reelers

Buffalo Bills = Buffalo Nils = Buffalo Spills
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by (few years ago!)
TOP TEN REASONS WHY BEER IS BETTER THAN RELIGION

10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.

9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.

8. Beer has never caused a major war.

7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.

6. When you have a Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.

5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over his brand of Beer.

4. You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second Beer.

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by (few years ago!)
Men Vs. Women Jokes

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by (few years ago!)
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by (few years ago!)
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Some yogurt visits a local bar

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